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- 3 Oct 2012
*circle prepositions
"This sentence is in need of an active verb"*Name the prepositionhigh usage verbs
conjugation --changing it to fit the noun
regular ways with regular verbs and irregular ways with irregular verbs.if a language survives it tends to change dramatically
Who whom
He him
She her
They them
Me and Jim went to the dance
Jim and I went to the dance
The girls came to the dance with Jim and me.
how to break a sentence up so people won't lose track of the sentence
Always exceptions to the rule
Examples on Monday.
The chirping of the crickets is thunderous
thunderous is the chirping of the crickets
the crickets chirping is thunderous
the crickets thunder
the crickets chirp thunderously
Use convoluted elevated language
don't use. dont be pretentious
shakespeare writes at the beginning of modern english
shakespeare defines what it means to be human in a modern setting
great texts tend to be simple and clean
passive voice--transitive
must have subject and object
swap places around the verb
in passive voice we swap the subject for the object
science can't ever be completely objective, all they can do is define the bias
proposal review living off grid--
- 8 Oct 2012
Discussion on ed ricketts.
Ed's philosophy
scientific observation
ed's father is wrong all the time, sign of genius
told his children three things
If we want a copy of that section of steinbeck he will send it to us.
news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2012/10/121008-joseph-kittinger-felix-baumgartner-skydive-science/
news that won't survive--escape literature
kids always want to write their own
Conrad--good typhoon writer
discussion on technical points of Conrad's writing
technical detail
roll call
Trimble's writing with style
Quote by Ernest Hemingway on writing farewell to arms
proofreading chapter
punctuate:
The teams included Bill, Ted and Jim; Alice and Chainey; and Adam Daniel, Vern and Boxy.
Joining two closely related sentences.
Coordinating Conjunction
I vote independently, but I do agree with Demorepubicrats sometimes.
Adverbial conjunction
I vote independently; however, I do agree with Demorepubicrats sometimes.
Coordinating Conjunction
I vote independently; for example, I haven't voted in 50 years because I can't find the independent party.
Adverbial conjunction
I vote independently; also, I do agree with Demorepubicrats sometimes.
I vote independently, although I do agree with Demorepubicrats sometimes.
adverbial conjunction
how do you prove this belongs with a semicolon? Remove the also and move it elsewhere in the sentence. If it can shift around in the sentence it is an adverbial conjunction.
There were four lights
I vote independently; nevertheless, my tribe does agree with Demorepubicrats.
We'll continue with punctuation next class.
Split off into teams. - 10 Oct 2012
Discussion on Firemaking Parts :
- Building the equipment
- preparation
- notching and burning in
- fuel
7 +/- 2
40 steps are too many
break them down
Analytical Process Description
analytical branches
Story about accidental stabbing of a kid - 15 Oct 2012
- 17 Oct 2012
- 22 Oct 2012
Purpose of this paper is to apply the paramedic method
work the problem in lanhamian method
preposition who's kicking who there
go back to the second sentence and compare it to the first sentence take out we will in the first sentence and lets see what you've got
difference
literary present, always in the present, go with describes instead of will describe because its a little more intense.
materials needed
Twine to strand, drew it by hand loved drawing in kindergarten now if a drawing is needed can't do it
elementary, simple, straightforward and understandable.
everything has meaning even blank space
Steps needed to make rope list steps in the introduction
this part might be formatted into a bullet list
if text gets too dense, break it up into a bullet list What's the difference between this element here and that one there
keeps the style
this is a line break within the paragraph
pull the margin to the right half an inch this is called a hanging paragraph
when we have an object being defined we use tag paragraphs
In Microsoft Word, most is going to be done in a lowest commondenominator toolmake it simple
linear text model vs object oriented model
in a linear text model it is a disaster
Start out designing with styles
If you've got to use word and do a lot of editing in Word attach them to end text and start text so it will move with the text.
Bean counter
I don't think number lock is on
its not anymore
further down
new document very similar to the needs of this document very process intensive
twine six time the desired length of rope
when you twist the rope it contracts
contracts to a tenth of length
C Clamps
How much of the writing is necessary?
Needs and image on C clamps
Headings and sub headings etc. are like stop signs. Even when you pull them out, the text still has to make sense.
Give an overview of the steps to make the rope.
setup process
strand process
be sure the hooks are facing the direction in which you are to make rope.
Readers only read a few sentences, then feel they have read enough
take the loose end of the twine and attachit.
Editing checklist step search down throught he whole document
subject of the sentence, You is implied, the command form imperative form attach the end is the core sentence with you impliedYou will never see a novel written in Arial more space consoming not for extend large blcks of text, easier to read a serif face using very short blocks of text this particular text displays larger
take some random words and put them in garmond, no perpetua
Leading from descender to descender
Point size.
Expressed intypography as a fraction
why does this text look somuch smaller if they are going t be the same size tex
leading the same, point size also the same
maximum . hieght of the .etters is the same
x height of these tow type faces is very different
a serif typeface, their risers are big and their counters are small
sans serif type has larger risers
typeface on road signs are in sans serif face
Headings would normally be sans serif
text body serif typeface, in technical documents body text in sans serif typeface
if there is a marketing component use a sans serif typeface
Print the document out even if emailing because the flaws will come out in the printing. Do a test print.
Use asymmetric line
updated the style put headings in sans serif
bod face and using the
Much of good document design is subtracting noise
Subgroup the stepsReduce really long step lists
step commentary(could put in parentheses)
Needs an image demonstrating perpendicular vertically and horizontallyOverhand knot, define with an image
comma splice difference between Adverbial conjunction big compund word sorts of things, take the comma
Test for adverbial conjunction, move the words around and see if they still work
Conjunction needs to be accompanied by a comma.
take out so it is horizontally, its an adverb
more images
form follows function
Two rhetorical modes we use Class is called technical communication
visual rhetoric and textual rhetoric
depending on the task yo are undertaking it might be very intensive
app for cpr on the cell phone with almost zero wrods with conceptual images to show how to do cpr
very good documentation
fomr foolws funcction you want to communicate with oyour audience as quickly as possible to get your point across so the reader isn't lost
where does text start
lascaux cave paintings the reason they still exist is because a landslide buried those caves for a few thousand years
forgotten language
written language started from pictographics
Knji has somewhat Congol hung onto the pictographic language
from syllabary we dropped to an alphabet
differentiating between text and visual rhetoric, but they had the same starting point get into teams pick up the discussion next time
Read Over the Edge: Death in the Grand Canyon Chapter 1. Notice format, technical details, rhetoric, flow. - 24 Oct 2012
Easier to teach to a worker than individuals with a sense of entitlement.
Rope making document
Did you revise the document after class discussion on Monday?What are the tradeoffs between using>>> and a generic image
look at that title
what are the two main elements of a title?
Content
Rhetorical structure of its content
Last paper--proposal
colon
title purpose subject
purpose of this document
Process description, not object description
Cut the whole title and put how to make rope
first thing in a document when you put it in someone's hands make sure they know what they're looking at
how to make rope using the acme rope maker
caption
what about captioning and graphics
captions are short and tell about the graphic
select graphic object
Where does the caption go under a graphic
look at the National Geographic and see where they put their captions
Typography leading and size
A lot of documents, leading is in the same Can stay in that case for your caption.
The rope making machine.
Figure 1 no numbering the image if it is from that page or the page facing set
If a couple of pages, then needs Fig 1 etc.
If its not yours, you are plagiarizing if you don't cite it.
Reference page
If it isn't yours you cite it.
text differentiated from the surrounding text
display different kinds of text in very small size
analytical organization of this document
Analytical--how it is broken into parts
First paragraph of the proposal overview of project what the project will contain
Missing introductory paragraph explaining what the document is for
Show the styles in the styles tool
click on materials list
click on the rope machine
Should it be in heading or subordinate to materials?
If he hits the hard return right now shift=enter line breaks and stays in the paragraph
edit the style to make it go to a body paragraph main paragraph is to have an introduction that describes your entire paper.
second paragraph needs an introduction to just that section.
introductory paragraph to just that section materials.
analytical writing 101
contract for some client, and write a proposal, or software implementation
explicit writing is necessary to make things clear fro people
Introduce analytical structure
like little nested essays over and over
still need an intro paragraph. for the entire document
Discussion on Santa Claus
Bullet list appropriate
difference in followup question
when a numbered list or bullet
there is a better way If order is significant use a number list
if order is not significant use a bullet list
form follows function
was order significant, yes because
more than one reason for order to be significant
one for counting
one for listing in sequence
If 20 steps, that is too many, need to be broken into sublists
Elegant design vs. pretty
elegant means functional
you can use certain typography that will make people avoid your stuff
Discussion on trade show and attention/volume
When we want someone to notice us we tend to shout
What do we do when its critical
call attention with different colors, bolding, parse out of text flow
dummies books are bad design
Bold text used for warning text
different from the design of the rest of the package so it is parsed out and we don't see it.
Modified into a number list by Ashley
Constancia 12
Sticky key
Putting a new style on it
based on no style
TiTles
needs purpose and subject
In the title
purpose ropemaking gude
Discussion on last batman movie
dark knight rises
subtitles
rhetorical structure is title and main title under
ropemaking guide how to twist twine to make a rope.
The longer the line width the more difficult for the eye to track
hierarchical
this text is subordinate to that heading
modify styles right click on body
how many typefaces pn this page? One. Clean. it works, doesn't distract.
No double hard returns
If you are really in a hurry do it right the first time then no time will be wasted catching up
update
groupings and so on
work on styles
remember hierarchy and establish that alignment
pull bullet item in and update it
Paper will describe how to make a rope step by step
document is a guide
most specific term the best term to use
How to--different functions
One how to is an adjective so it is hyphenated
When it isn't it doesn't need to be hyphenated
progressive form of a verb, put them together they become an adjective
moved text around
don't try to flow text around an image Steps required
Processes
transitive sentence
overhand knot on ropemaking board hyphenated or not?
Yes describing the board
make sure you break your steps down
from google images
if its a step do a step
if its not a step, pull it out of the steps
- 29 Oct 2012
recto right,
verso left
pictograph serves as a chapter marker
chapter about how many people fall here
heat strke
swimming in water
great cement mixer
so much silt its like a cement mixer
why not move content to the bottom
header vs footer
goe where the eyes hit the page first content
signposts, navigation tools
secondary even tertiary
Header is competing with the chapter titl
move all of the header elements at the bottom of the page
move secondary information down
Title
what we geneerally do with titles
truncate titles to make them less obtrusive
instead of saying chapter on do
truncate instead of chapter three say just 3
when tehey're in their own text
both quotes
most dangerous hting you can do
falls heat exhaustion
recreation
fall
falling i
Leave it alone
data skewing
FAA
discussion on skewed
tie in graphic
icon used
creating the icon then repeating it in the header
get rid of the underline
what is the underline doing to the typogrohy
get rid of it
interrupts the flow
thye use a hook
amelias raise
race
n madeus
en madeus race
in the middle of things
start in progress
get her off that wall
how would you redo that sentence
how do you fix that sentence
one used blind as the main verb
rule
if you are writing and revising
keep an editing list of things to revise
the string ly
"ly"adverbs, things you can get rid of
blindingly is overwritten you can get rid of it
flash bulbs blinded him
how many dots are there
why four dots
ellpsis
how many in one ellpsis
means an ellipsis with a period at the end
four dots because of
there are a few cases of ellipsis use
I walak the dog when jackson is away...having been given the responsibility
means still in the same sentence having deleted some text
ellipsis plus a period
period.
each dot variation means something.. with space, without space
without space is a period
put space between each dot it looks cooler
Jackson finally....Whew
lost material started another sentence
Canada geese
period ellipsis or ellpsis period?
Creative writing, use an ellipsis to trail off
what happens i
n the next paragraph
how does the next paragraph end
ellipsis
quotations outside of
italic indented text
So extended quote
one thing we do in extended quotes is indent the quotes
italics
don't need italics
indentation is enough to set off the quote
italics to indicate internal dialogue
don't need to italicize it
from here on conventional storytelling mode
Doppler effect
story after story
summation
end of each chapter statistics
children don't fall into the Grand Canyon generally
adults and double standards
falls within the canyon on page 27
1 thousand cubic miles
last sentince very large technical detailed geological
constantly taxonomizing or putting things in buckets
constantly analytically breaking it dodown
what are dendrites
dendritic discussion
nervous system
a dendrite is a branch
branching, seeping anohter mineral into it
any complex branching might be called dendritic
like tree roots
look at the table
for that first chapter
name and age
date locationa nd circumstances
location on rim
circumstance id folded under yet given its own column
what if you blow away the header for this table
its not going to be difficult to understand
dates
structure of the table is self defining, doesn't really need a header
how good is the documentation
up until the thrities pretty good
does this have an index?
does this have an appendix
very easy to find people and deaths in the tables and in the index you can find the longer accounts
explanation of why this book was written discussion
how to instructions
more liberal on sourcing in tech comm
validate how reputable the source is
page 227
chapter 5 if looks could kill
Vern's book is a different copy
newly expanded tenth anniversary edition with added material
parachute drop
in the middle
next chapter to read from this
Chapter 2
the desert crucible the desert crucible environmental death
title should be the same
what happened to deedee after she fell off the edgefrom narrative to analytical mo - 31 Oct 2012
Discussion on Magnesium mine operation
introducing a book for the writing conference for social change
Luddite
Setup for class
Computer Projector is always off
Overhead always has to be moved
Canaries on the rim
living downwind in the west
chip ward
Discussion on operations at Dugway Proving Grounds.
Chlorine production plant
Tooele army depot
recycle munitions
to enhance his rhetoric, he's been hyperbolic
Discussion on waist belts for their packs.
The bigger you are the greater the distance between
Chapter 2 Discussion Death in Grand Canyon
100 Arabic number but three is spelled out in text page 83 why isn't there a hyphen there?
page 81
go back to 64 the rule varies between style guide after ten you use the Arabic number
100-degree day
100 no hyphen degrees
compund adjective--100 degrees, no hyphen
one's a ranger and river guide and one is a physician in Flagstaff
make great analytical deductions from the stories
Each carried a minimum of three two liter
page 81 last paragraph toward the bottom
why between liter and quart
attribute
tech writing teacher, don't mix measurements
10 or below spell it out, above use Arabic
Stay in Arabic if document is highly technical
if jumping back and forth confusing to the mind and slows down cognition
page 81 last comlete paragraph mixing metric and English probably how they were measured out
one has arabic and one has spelled out
Define what two liter bottles and canteens per boy
comma doesn't need to be there
3 and two can be misconstrued change the 3 to text
What is the antecedent of that?
this amount of water was also meant to prepare dehydrated food
noun ought to be really close
be consistent there will be errors in any text
texts are never consistent
stay on 81
one anecdote then transitions
go to paragraph that starts "the lesson"
summarizes lesson learned
Never fall asleep at a sleepover, lesson learned.
the lesson learned, linda's losses,
more serious note-may have influenced other hikers
transition, even so
go on to another story, interspersed comical quixotic stories of survival with stories of death
what would you say about accessibility to different anecdotes
more explicit within chapters, sections, subsection break and subheading
next case--adults never take responsibility for the problem
the way the authors break down the problem is really good
go to 85 to the end
what went wrong here
now we are in summative text
brekdown analytically
those responsible chose not only the hottest but the driest,
71 hyphen year old
trip was made up of novice grand canyon hikers
need to carry so much water
good accounting of tragically incompetently led scout trip
scale a quart an hour in direct sun and shade
metaphor--inverted mountain
easier to go down than come back up
anecdote about troops
don't tr;y hiking those mountains--scale, no sense of scale or vastness, seasonality season is a function of time geographis space and altitude
teach in A block of summer
next spring he is teaching wilderness writing
in order to read the txt
great first text is the wilderness itself
anything else is secondary research
high country in May
spring thaw a glorious time
snow lilies
animals
prepare for travel
no gators no
altitude vs progression of time
bullet list format to make it pop out more
hanging indent
subheadings to break up anecdotes would be useful in this text
One other thing in the style and craft of writing
is it passive voice? Almost never
page 84
quote--Melanie Miles--spent most ofher time with the boys
within three to four hours, definitely more
clear writing
specific detail never generalize
Phillips all jumbled und a mesquite tree
quote fromt he book about Phillips clearly stated active voice
puls was 180
blood pressure was extremely low
good quiz question what was linda dog's name
she was from pennsylvania
jumping to the table
knock off headers from table not really necessary
Photoshop revision of the cover
don't need photoshop
pulleout maps
synaptic design
If you put some leading between the date and location an circumstances sections might be more readable they need to look like separate objects
how many typefaces is it using? One bold italicized and sizze changed a little bitt
use one typeface. Keep it simple
sturgeions law
if you open to everyone the quality of publishing will decrease
aesthetic sensibility is often lacking in desktop publishing
almost finished, discussion on directors
did anoyne read death from the air
helicopter flying down the canyon got tangled in the wire
Famous image on the back, huge boat
boatlike qualities not airplane qualities
one last thing
Monday--Consultations Monday
See where we are on our projects if in teams come together as team groups
If we hurry
4pm in his office, recyclers
3:30
245 daedalus
330 herbals
400 recyclers
430 off gridders - 7 Nov 2012
- 12 Nov 2012
- 14 Nov 2012
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