These things were going on when my marriage was coming to an end.
I never look at these women without knowing that I came very close to being one of them, a club no one wants to join, the club of murdered spouses. Now I just have to hope I won't be joining the club of murdered ex-spouses.
Why do people murder their spouses?
Feelings run too high I guess, based on unmet expectations or misplaced frustration.
I think also that one person wants to control the other person.
I only know, that I never want to feel that from another person again. I don't want to live in a world of disapproval and disappointment because I can't match the image in some man's mind of what he wants in a woman. I never want another person to have the power to affect my life in the way he did and has and is still doing.I never want that for my children. It is better to remain solitary than to be with someone who chases rumors of grass that is greener in other pastures.
If I could ask one thing of God it would be to help appropriate social relationships to always exist in my family that will not allow the destruction of the most precious feelings that bind the human race together. These are the feelings of caring and compassion and trust and kindness. If those had not been lost, Lori Hacking and Laci Peterson would still be alive, and Elizabeth Smart would never have gone through the ordeal she went through.
And I would not be divorced.
I am grateful to God for not making me a princess, a model or a movie star, with too much attention and not enough caring.
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